spitfire, throwing fire. (the prodigy, ronald jenkees)

I'm at an impass.

I am unsure of what lies ahead. My path has darkened infront of me. Things are pushing past me. I don't have time to breathe, and old family arguments have re surfaced. Exams approacheth. I sat one earlier, i have another one tomorrow. A third on monday. I fear that, even though i worked over easter, that i may not have done enough. My friends have worked, and it is obvious. Some have fallen by the wayside, either due to medical reasons, and i wish them the swiftest of recoveries so they can return to the fray, and some have simply decided they have had enough.

And it is the second that get at me. For there is nothing i hate more than a man who runs from a fight they have entered. In combat, it is morally acceptable to die at your opponents hands. Not to run like a dog. The question is, in this situation, what would you do. I know i would not run, for i am too proud. I am also not very modest.

I have asked lottie to help me with my other key issue, she said she would, i am hoping for good news. If there is not any, then i will re-cloth myself in my fieldmarshals uniform. For i am the fieldmarshal of the singles brigade, and this means that you can fuck right off.

i survived my mountain of prep for the day. 2 history essays, a chemistry paper, and some latin. Latin is in the blood. Not everyone has it. But it is there. It flows in mine, more so than others. you all know my moto, and most of you know that i go around with caesaris written on my left wrist. i'm thinking of adding filius to that, this would inturn make me either Augustus Caesar, Aggripa Postula, or Tiberius. You guys can tell i'm a historian by birth, and i like classical history the most, either that or renaissance Italian. Italian history and me go together, and one day i hope to write one of these in fluid Italian. My sons shall speak it, and my daughters shall speak it. Either that, or arabic, for i have always wanted to know how to speak some of that. And if anyone knows how to say almighty in arabic, or what the word achminem means, if anything at all, it would be valued greatly.

And breathe.

I hope for good news, wish me luck.

For i love you all,

Jx

Song of the day: Throwing fire - Ronald Jenkees
Quote of the day: 'Cos you know that i can' - The Prodigy